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The White Hat Melbourne Newsletter

Archived Newsletter No.140 - 2 September 2005

Contents

Fathers Day
Comedy
Music & Dance
Big Day Out
Food
Melbourne's Hidden Gems
Reader feedback
Where it all began
Fashion
Melbourne's Lanes & Alleys
Writing
Country Victoria
The White Hat Quiz

Fathers Day

The whole family could get cheap Sunday tickets and head for the Wattle Festival (pronounced ‘wo_ul’) at Hurstbridge. Steam train rides, face painting and sausage sizzle. (Actually I don’t know about the face painting and sausage sizzle but I’ve got a 90% chance of being right.) Details at Community Festivals in Melbourne.

If dad is a Gen-X and of the adventure-on-demand generation then buy him a voucher for an adventure activity (complete with video to prove it) at Adventure Activities. We’re sure he’ll love it. (Well we’re not actually, but we’ll get a percentage if you buy it through our website.)

If dad is a baby boomer, just bring him his bong and his slippers and ask him again how he met your mum.

Comedy

This week a major comedy improvisation festival gets under way. There are also workshops on physical comedy this weekend in Prahran so when you next fall flat on your face at the office party you can explain it was part of your cert 4 in physical comedy. Details at Comedy in Melbourne.

Music & Dance

Paco Pena and his Flamenco Dance Troupe are performing at the Frankston Arts Centre (yes Virginia, there is a Frankston Arts Centre) and next day at Hamer Hall. Details at Dance in Melbourne.

 Pro Arte Orchestra have a concert at BMW Edge. There are also several concert of new music at Melba Hall.

Big Day Out

Tomorrow (Saturday) New Zealanders are being let out for a Big Day at Fed Square.

Food

This week several food festivals continue. There is slow food on the Bellarine Peninsula and The Melbourne Food Festival continues. See Food Festivals.

Melbourne's Hidden Gems

I thought we would start a section on some of our favourite suburban eating establishments, so let’s kick it off with Footscray.

Please note: This section of the newsletter has been removed as it forms part of a forthcoming publication or because it is forms part of our Questing activities. If you find yourself on a tour where the guide is White Hat Accredited they are likely to know the answer to many questions you may have in this area. All guides on White Hat Tours are White Hat Accredited.

Reader feedback

“Some months ago you told us about a young lady in New York trying to catch up with the love of her life. You never told us what happened!!!
Judy”

Judy, I will attempt to find out. After all she does own an apartment in New York and I do have her contact details in my little black book.

“Congratulations … informed, intelligent, irreverent.
James”

Thanks James – we might consider using that. Do you know how much a marketing agency would charge to come up with a strapline like that and you’ve just given it away for free? Who knows? If we could harness all that energy and creativity you readers put into work avoidance on a Friday afternoon we might all get rich.

“Come on White Hat! At least tell us SOMETHING about yourself.
Mandy & Andy”

It looks like these requests are not going away so I will make a start. See the following section: Where It All Began

Where it all began

There was no denying it. Something was glowing in the corner of the room. I had gradually become aware of it after waking from a strangely deep sleep. At first I thought that my eyes were merely adjusting to the light, but – no – something was definitely glowing. I was uneasy. “Still”, I thought – “it’s better than waking up and finding that you’ve turned into a giant insect”. I tried to reassure myself by drawing up a list of things it was better than. A poke in the eye with a burnt stick. Ending a sentence with a preposition. Last night’s pie floater.

I still didn’t feel comfortable and as my eyes began to focus I could gradually discern an outline. It was a hat – quite definitely a hat – a glowing white hat. Something inside me said “so this is where it all begins”. Of course back then I didn’t realise that this wasn’t really the beginning but the middle. Nor did I understand the unusual power of the hat and the strange times and wondrous places to which it would lead me. Little could I imagine the sights and sounds that would greet me on that magical time when I …

But I digress. I know you are anxious to learn about fashion parades in Thornbury and concerts in Frankston, so maybe more of that story another time.

Fashion

Next week is the Fashion Buying Fair (for those in the trade). and fashion parades at Thornbury. Details at: http Fashion in Melbourne. Next week marks the start of Spring Fashion week. Details in those magazines that nobody buys but everyone reads in the supermarket checkout queues. For those interested in wearable art, there is a fair featuring hand decorated bras in Creswick. Make an artistic statement at your next cocktail party. Details at Goldfields.

The other day I noticed the trainee stylists and beauty consultants all having a fag on Elizabeth Street – not outside their building but the one next door. They had obviously been told not to smoke outside the Institute. If all organisations take this approach I suspect we will need to adopt the protocol that everybody moves one building to the left in order to smoke.

Melbourne's lanes and alleys

Next Tuesday, Weston Bate is giving a talk followed by a guided tour of Melbourne’s lanes. We have had some discussion in this newsletter lately around this subject, so those of you who are really interested might want to go and hear the man who ‘wrote the book’. Weston Bate’s book Essential but Unplanned is a thorough history of Melbourne’s lanes and alleys with wonderful photographs and maps. Weston Bate is one of the finest historians of Melbourne but I should warn you his approach to history is hopelessly out of fashion. He researches meticulously, writes in an entertaining manner and lets readers draw their own conclusions. Of course it has become much more fashionable to start with an ‘attitude’, assemble a few supporting ‘facts’ and ‘interpret’ them to the reader or listener. After all, the idea that history is about providing information about the past is so yesterday. However, if you are so unfashionable as to want to understand how central Melbourne grew and developed I can recommend this event. Details at Forums in Melbourne.

Writing

This week there is a writers’ day at the Box Hill Institute. Details at Literary Events in Melbourne.

If you go along to a professional institute of writing and editing and work hard at your writing skills over several years and have the talent and the luck to have a manuscript accepted by the traditional publishers then you may end up with a publication that is read by up to several thousand people. Then again if you throw together a weekly newsletter with no second reading, proofing or editing it can be read on a weekly basis by over 6,000 people. Scary, isn’t it?

Country Victoria

This weekend is the Rushworth possum walk as well as the Bellarine Slow Food Festival and daffodil festivals in Beaufort and Kyneton. The Kyneton Festival is appointing a Daffodil King and Queen. I bet the local lads are all vying for the honour of being chosen Daffodil King. Details at Victoria.

The White Hat Quiz

How well do you know Melbourne?

Cathie was first with the answers to last week’s quiz and on being informed of this replied: “Bows and modestly blushes to applause”

Annalese responded: “Woo hoo!! Food!! This is only the second time I’ve thought myself capable to responding to the almighty White Hat quiz. I have little doubt though that this time will be similar to the last, being that you will be inundated with responses and once again my little voice won’t be heard among the crowd. But anyway, it’s a good way to pass a Friday afternoon under the guise of working diligently at my computer . . .”

Andrew continued with the answers to last week’s quiz (and the carryover question from the week before).

Please note: This section of the newsletter has been removed as it forms part of a forthcoming publication or because it is forms part of our Questing activities. If you find yourself on a tour where the guide is White Hat Accredited they are likely to know the answer to many questions you may have in this area. All guides on White Hat Tours are White Hat Accredited.

Congratulations to all the others (including George, Pauline, Lisa, Graham, Judith, Martin, Leanne, Lee, Peter, Lilliana, Jayne and numbers of others).

Now to this week’s quiz.

Melbourne has inspired numbers of writers, books and poems.

1. Who was the Melbourne librarian who wrote a story about convict life at Port Arthur?
2. What is the title of the novel about bushrangers written by a member of the Melbourne Club?
3. A murder mystery yarn about Melbourne in the 1880’s out-sold Arthur Conan Doyle in the 19th century. What is the name of the book?
4. The Sentimental Bloke has a poem about going to see Romeo & Juliet. What are the last lines of that poem?
5. What book is a thinly veiled description of real life characters in the suburb of Carringbush?
6. Who is the only Australian writer to have a bust in Westminster Abbey?
7. In what document does the description – “parcel of big, ugly, fat-necked, wombat-headed, big-bellied, magpie-legged, narrow-hipped, splay-footed sons of Irish bailiffs” - occur, and to whom is it referring?